IT'S ALL ABOARD THE HS2! (weekly poem)

IT'S ALL ABOARD THE HS2!

The Government hopes that spending £42.6bn* on a High Speed

train service will rejuvenate the economy—despite others doubts.

* Does not include £7bn for the rolling stock. See note (3) below.

It's all aboard the HS2,

To join the Fast Buck scrum;

And cut some twenty minutes off,

The journey north to Brum.

Then on to Manchester and Leeds,

And Sheffield via Crewe;

Let's hope that wheelchair users find,

A clean and working loo!

The NAO says it's a sham, (1)

The PAC a farce; (2)

To simply help fat businessman,

Relax in the First Class.

The Government's railroading spin,

Is trying hard to kid;

The lot of us that it should spend,

Some Forty Billion quid.

Even the private IEA, (3)

Aren't on the project's side;

And recognise that vanity,

Drives this High Speed Train ride.

The IOD's boss says it's just, (4)

A “Folly,” nothing less;

Most of his members think the scheme's,

An economic mess.

Not so the Transport Industry,

Who stand to make a buck;

From lobbying a government,

That trusts in 'Business luck'.

The Shires of Middle England feel,

They soon will be assailed;

Unless the cord is firmly pulled,

And the whole plan derailed!

(1) National Audit Office.

(2) Public Accounts Committee.

(3) Institute of Economic Affairs estimate final costs of £80bn.

(4) Institute of Directors.

© Richard Layton