THE UPPER-CLASS TWIT OF THE YEAR 2017!
(Apologies to the BBC & SPOTY)
Bookies Odds: Jacob Rees-Mogg 5/4 on; Boris Johnson 3/1;
Michael Gove 5/1; Jeremy Hunt 20/1; Dennis Skinner 500/1.
All Workers! Your chance cometh near,
As you can now vote with your rear;
For a windy old fart,
Who you think fits the part,
Of “Upper-Class Twit of the Year”!
The Beeb says that it will record,
Your choice of a Nob or a Lord;
So choose any posh Berk,
With a toffee-nosed smirk,
For this most prestigious award.
One could, of course, just vote by rote,
For Tories who own a clean moat;
As most other MP's,
Though not down on their knees,
Aren't foppish enough for your vote.
You may like to narrow your bet,
And keep to the Public-School set;
Yes, you all know the type,
Affectation and hype,
RP and the 'reight' etiquette! (1)
One need not be too doctrinaire,
As Toffs with grey cells are quite rare;
If you vote for a Nob,
With a snobby posh gob,
You're in with a wing and a prayer.
There are Chinless Wonders and Twits,
And Henry's who dine at the Ritz;
So make sure your vote's made,
For the swanky brigade,
And upper-class twit you think fits!
(1) Received Pronunciation.
© Richard Layton