AURI SACRA FAMES!
(‘Cursed craving for gold’ – Virgil. The Aeneid )
The forthcoming Olympic Games will no doubt bring the usual
positive drug tests and far-fetched denials and explanations.
The positive drug test came as,
An unexpected shock;
It must be something they put in,
My lump of Brighton Rock.
Or else it was the Tetley bags,
They put into my tea;
That’s caught me out when I gave them,
My second sample pee.
Or maybe Martians landed and,
Their rocket engine’s heat;
Boiled over my cough mixture gel,
And made me look a cheat.
Whatever the real problem is,
You all must surely see;
Though I’m the only one to gain,
It couldn’t have been me!
And, anyway, who kids themselves,
The Games are healthy sport;
Success today in every way,
Depends on what you snort!
© Richard Layton