Tuesday, October 25, 2016

A CUNNING (G)RASPING WHEEZE! (weekly poem)

A CUNNING (G)RASPING WHEEZE!     

The Fancy Bears Hack Team have shown that many top sports people
have been diagnosed with asthma - conveniently allowing them to take
performance-enhancing drugs under the ‘Therapeutic Use Exemptions’.

For athletes at the top today,
It helps if one takes drugs,
Although the dangers are well-known,
And most would say they’re mugs;
But craving fame, the risks are met,
With unresponsive shrugs.

Of course the beastly Russians are,
Quite active in this sphere,
By concentrating on the ‘Reds’,
We hope this public smear;
Will kid folk that we’re straight and that,
It never happens here!

All our sports folk are squeaky clean,
And free from ‘drug disease’,
It’s mere coincidence they’ve got,
An apt, ‘asthmatic wheeze’;
Cured only by ‘Performance Drugs’--
A wheeze inclined to please!

Exemptions to take all such drugs,
Are given by the score,
And Britain’s up there with the rest, (1)
In signing more and more;
As these exceptions are allowed,
By ‘anti-doping law’!

Today in money-grubbing sport,
The dollar is the king,
And sports associations love,
The glamour and the bling;
And drug hypocrisy all helps,
To make their cash tills ring.

(1) Fancy Bears are believed to have ‘Therapeutic Use Exemptions’
(TUEs) data on forty-four British athletes and sports people.

© Richard Layton  

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