A GOVE-RNMENT FANTASY!
July 2014-Michael Gove demoted to Chief Whip.
The teaching unions rejoice,
At the demise of Gove;
Regarded by the many as,
A disputatious cove.
He’s been demoted in the ranks,
To the post of Chief Whip;
Reducing all his chances to,
Command the Tory ship. (1)
As Chief Whip he’ll allegedly,
Wear thigh-length leather boots;
And in his ‘dominatrix’ gear, (2)
Spank lots of his old fruits!
The Cons were always keen to flog,
The destitute and poor;
But now they’ve got the taste themselves,
They’re clamouring for more!
At their Head Office Hell Fire Club,
In Matthew Parker Street;
The reprobates from Westminster,
Have to be quite discreet.
As in the dungeon things go on,
That really are quite lewd;
A closet world that plumbs the depths,
Of moral turpitude!
They’ve borrowed handcuffs from the Met.,
And Tracey Emin’s bed; (3)
So when not lying to us all,
They’re lying down instead.
Now when they’re busy and ‘tied up’,
That’s the one thing that’s true;
Which thus explains the reason why,
The Tory colour’s Blue!
(1) Some saw Gove as a future Tory leader.
(2) Men’s Libbers should note that there
is no formal word for a male equivalent.
(3) Exhibited at the Tate Gallery in 1999 along with
‘condoms & clothing soiled with bodily secretions’.
© Richard Layton
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