Socialist Rant No. 3
Assassination Shows How Much You care
“I’m an assassin,” the assassin said,
“Who wants all other assassins dead!
Because it is my free market mission
To eliminate all competition.
Whether by stiletto or David’s stone,
Bullet or bomb or poison or drone,
My competitive edge is increased
By the number of those I’ve deceased.
My actions aren’t covert, far better for me
To be the headline on prime time TV,
Where I stand before my people and declaim,
‘I commit my acts of slaughter in your name!’
My poll ratings soar to such an extent
By popular lot I become president,
Which means I’m such an important figure
I no longer actually pull the trigger.
I lounge in my office, pick up the phone
And let loose a bullet, bomb or a drone.
Then it’s another assassin dismissed,
Who, being foreign, is a terrorist,
Condemned through media depiction
Not requiring judicial conviction.
Should I ever suffer a similar fate,
I’ll be glorified by a grateful state.”